A Birthday Present? For Me? You Shouldn’t Have!
Urgh! I just reminded myself it’s my birthday in a month’s time. Ever since I was young I’ve hated birthdays. They’re not a cause for celebration; they’re a hurdle of chronology that once you get over marks you down as another year older.
My mum is the only person who remembers my birthday and I’m hoping once she forgets that will be it, I will never have another birthday and therefore not get any older. At least that’s my plan.
If I happen to get anything for my birthday I like to get gadgets and useful thingumabobs. I have a friend who sends me bizarre things that she finds in swap meets like Soviet space pencils or more personalised gifts like a mug that she painted herself that shows a tiger chasing himself around it. Quirky presents like that I like, it’s things like slippers or hokey ‘multipurpose’ wotsits that fail to perform even the most basic tasks for which they were supposed to be designed that tick me off.
Don’t you find that if some-one buys you a present and it breaks, you feel guilty? The person who gave it you aught to feel guilty! It’s like they are saying “I bought you this, it’s useless and a bit cheap but that’s what I think of you!”
Or perhaps I should just get over my hatred of Birthdays.
Given the way I think about birthdays I bet you can guess my opinions on Christmas can’t you? All the shops seem to start gearing up for Christmas earlier and earlier. I have seen Christmas trees outside some shops and ‘Book now for Christmas’ ads in restaurant windows as early as September. I still go to the beach in September! But if you’re looking for Christmas gift ideas always try and remember to get the person the kind of gift you’d get them any other time of year. A plastic nodding Santa doesn’t say “I really appreciate you”. It says “I couldn’t think of what to give you and this was the first thing that came to hand”. For the sake of harmony at Christmas, if you can’t just ignore it until it goes away, please get presents that show you cared enough to think about the recipient.
Ho Ho Ho.
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